Stopover in Fort Lauderdale or
HOW TO VISIT MAI-KAI
and avoid getting on a plane for just one more day
: : I hate flying. And it gets worse and worse each time I get on a plane. An irrational fear... I know that statistics... I understand the principles... my father made a living designing planes for over 45 years! But I still hate flying. I think it’s all about not being in control. If I’m in a car crash, it’s only going to be about a 50% chance that it’s my fault. If something happens while I’m in a plane, it’s pretty much going to be 100% NOT my fault. So these days, who’s gonna get me back on a plane? Not you... : :
: : But this past summer, the last time I worked up the guts to put myself into one of those tin cans, I made may way (along with Betty, of course) down to Fort Lauderdale, Florida. We had planned a cruise vacation to the western Carribean and Mexico. A well-deserved break after a horrid year-and-a-half at work, where things were not going well at all. Returning to Fort Lauderdale after 7 days of travelling on our big floating buffet table, I had planned an extra day on land before flying back to Montreal. This would give us the chance to visit one of the grand-daddies of the vintage Polynesian palaces, Mai Kai, founded in 1956. I had been wanting to visit this place for years. Somehow, even though I did a lot of vacationing at “Polynesian resorts” in Florida with my folks in the late 60s to mid-70s, I had never been to Mai Kai. : :
: : The rain and wind began on our last night on the cruise ship, as we approached Fort Lauderdale. By the time they spit us out onto the dock (at 8:00 a.m.!), the weather was absolutely lousy. Our hotel room obviously wasn’t ready at this early hour (and wouldn’t be until 3 p.m., due to the fact that the joint was packed with kids in town for a big swimming competition being held at the Swimmers’ Hall of Fame, across the street from the hotel), so we checked our bags and starting walking. We had breakfast... the weather got worse. The beach was deserted... We popped in and out of the shops to kill some more time, periodically making our way back to the hotel to see if the room was ready. By the time we did check in, the weather had built up to hurricane-like conditions. All I could think about was having to get on a plane and fly through this crap the next day... : :
: : Anyway, after a drink and a bit of rum cake in our room overlooking the stormy sea, I was feeling better and it was time to make our way to dinner and the Polynesian revue at the Mai Kai. Maybe this weather would give it all a “tropical storm” atmosphere... : :
: : And you know what? It did. When the taxi dropped us off at the entrance, the big leaves on the trees and plants in Mai Kai’s lush tropical gardens were dripping. It was warm and quiet, just like after a tropical rainfall. We made our way inside where we were greeted by a series of older, grey-haired men in blue nautical blazers: one checked our reservation, one guided us to the gift shop (yes, the Mai Kai has a great gift shop filled with mugs, Aloha shirts, Hawaiian videos, souvenirs, etc!), and one more guided us to the amazing Molokai Bar to the left of the front entrance. Every one of these guys called me “Sir”... classy place.
: :: : The bar was fantastic. Very nautical. It looked like the inside of a big, old sailing ship... a lot of rope, lanterns, rain pouring down on the windows (I’m still not sure if this was an effect or if it had started raining outside again for real). Drinks, including the Malayan Mist, the Mara-Amu, and the Hidden Pearl, were expensive but potent... and served by scantily-clad waitresses. : :
: : Soon, it was time for dinner and the show. We were guided by yet another blue-blazered, grey-haired host to our table facing the stage. The seating options at Mai Kai are varied. The place is huge! Eight dining rooms... some more intimate than others, and all decked out in outstanding “authentic” Polynesian decor. We were sitting at what was more or less a communal dining table. We had requested this in order to have a good view of the show. The food was great too, not your usual Polynesian buffet fare. Mai Kai’s web-site says that their cuisine is “award-winning”. We had goat-cheese salad, firecracker shrimps, lemongrass pork, and orange beef... all very good... finishing off, since we were in Florida, with some Key Lime Pie. : :
: : The Polynesian revue began during the meal and was hosted by a Maori MC who can best be described as a combination of Don Ho and Crocodile Dundee... very smooth. His job is to give the crowd a little history by introducing dances representing each island or region of Polynesia. He also tells a few jokes and reminds us to stop in at the gift shop... as I said, very smooth. The revue’s dancers were quite amazing. This show somehow seemed more authentic than other Polynesian revues I’ve heard of (like the Lake George show reviewed in our last issue). : :
: : Finally, when the show and the meal are over, a walk through Mai Kai’s huge garden is highly recommended. Even in Florida’s warm climate, we wondered how some of this stuff could survive. Really beautiful... and every so often along the way, we were surprised by a tiki peaking out through the leaves... : :
: : Well anyway, I obviously did get on my plane the next day, terrified and praying – faced with airport construction, faulty plane parts, stormy weather, missed connections, and more stormy weather – but satisfied that I’d at least had the chance to make it to the Mai Kai. And instead of the expected 4 hour flight, it only took 12 hours to get home... So tell me, who’s gonna get me back on a plane? Not you... : :
Mai Kai
John Trivisonno © 2002
CLICK TO ENLARGE PHOTOS
