PIT STOP IN KOWLOON
: : Earlier this year, having just recently read through the many reviews in James Teitelbaum’s book Tiki Road Trip, I found myself looking for an opportunity to hop into the car and head out to any one of the spots featured in the book. Of course, I’ve always made it a point to seek out and visit any Tiki temple I may be lucky enough to encounter on my travels. But here now was a wealth of information at my fingertips, pointing me to Tiki bars in virtually any direction I would choose to travel. : :
: : Finally, in July, armed with James’s book and more detailed directions from Mapquest.com, I was able to take a slight detour on my way to Boston and make a mid-afternoon pit stop at Kowloon, in Saugus, MA. I don’t want to re-hash James’s or anybody else’s review here but I do want to share some personal impressions of Kowloon. : :
: : Based on the review in Tiki Road Trip and on comments posted on the Tiki Central forums, I knew that Kowloon was not a Tiki bar/restaurant per se but rather a grand, old-style Chinese dining establishment. Kowloon was in fact opened by the Wong family in the 1950s and is gigantic, featuring 5 or 6 different dining areas. : :
: : From the outside, Kowloon is pretty impressive; the structure is a standout even among all the other crazy stuff you can see along Route 1 (including my personal favourite, Frank Giuffrida’s Hilltop Steak House). Despite a 1960s-era expansion and a partial remodel in the 80s, Kowloon has kept its original roadside sign featuring the restaurant’s name in an old Oriental-style font and, below it, the words “Cocktail Lounge” and two martini glasses in off-kilter neon. The older section of the restaurant has a pagoda-like roof common to many Chinese restaurants but the main entrance area (which I believe is probably part of the 1960s expansion) and the adjoining structure is a massive A-frame and long-house design familiar to Tiki-philes. Looming over the front door is a huge Tiki to greet visitors as they make their way inside. : :
: : I must say that as impressed as I was by the outside, my first impression of Kowloon’s interior was a bit of a disappointment. The first areas encountered are not at all Tiki (nor are they vintage Chinese for that matter): the Hong Kong Lounge looks more like a sports bar, and the Luau Room, while looking decent in the brochure, was unavailable for viewing. I won’t even discuss the generic, modern Chinese restaurant decor of the Mandarin Room and Thai Grille. The only two areas of the restaurant worth talking about – when talking Tiki anyway – are the Volcano Bay Room and the Tiki Lagoon. : :
: : As is mentioned in other reviews and can be seen in the photos here, the Volcano Bay Room is designed to look like a schooner, with a great bar at one end, and a volcano relief-mural and palm trees running along the length of another wall. It is adjacent to the Tiki Lagoon area, separated by a row of booths covered by thatched huts. The Tiki Lagoon is the more informal dining area, consisting of booths surrounding a lagoon (actually just a fountain) watched over by statue that is not exactly what you’d call a Tiki. : :
: : Since it was mid-afternoon when my wife and I arrived at Kowloon, we were seated at a booth in the Tiki Lagoon and handed menus featuring the Luncheon specials. Although I can’t comment on the cocktails (coming off of the half-day drive from Montreal and not having reached our final destination yet, I wasn’t quite ready to start drinking), the food was pretty good. We didn’t sample much but my Kung Pao chicken was quite tasty and very spicy. Now, for some reason these days, I just can’t eat Kung Pao chicken without thinking of George Costanza sweating through his meal of some super spicy “Kung POW!” on an episode of Seinfeld… : :
: : And Seinfeld was on my mind that afternoon at Kowloon too… Perhaps, in some strange way, he is partly to blame for some of the disappointing aspects of Kowloon. Let me explain. Keeping a place the size of Kowloon running for so many years must really be quite something. The restaurant needs more than the likes of me stopping in for the luncheon special to keep things profitable. Just look at how many other big, vintage Polynesian palaces we’ve lost in recent years (and old Chinese restaurants for that matter – see “Who Killed Kenny?” elsewhere in this issue). Places like Kowloon sometimes have to resort to doing whatever is necessary to keep the folks coming, keep the seats filled, and keep the cooks, wait staff and bartenders busy. For this reason, the Hong Kong Lounge becomes a sports bar, sections of the restaurant get remodelled to try to cash in on the “popularity” of Thai food, and the Luau Room – rather than simply being host to luaus or banquets – is turned into a venue for the likes of Phyllis Diller, Pat Cooper, and Jerry Seinfeld… : :
: : So, if stand-up comics and dinner shows like The Sopranos’ Last Supper weren’t brought in to draw the crowds, would the Kung Pao and exotic decor be enough to keep Kowloon’s 1200 seats filled? A bit of a sad situation isn’t it? : :
: : In an ideal world, for me anyway, the only acceptable entertainment in a Tiki bar would be some variation of exotica (played live by a combo or spun by a d.j.), a Polynesian floor show, or some low-key lounge jazz. What can I do to keep hope alive but look to the fortune found in my cookie at Kowloon: “If your desires are not extravagant, they will be granted.” : :
Kowloon
948 Broadway (Rt. 1 North)
Saugus, MA 01906
(781) 233-0077
John Trivisonno © 2003
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